How about we next travel from Respect to Truth as we complete the SUPPORT acronym outlining what every caregiver deserves? Let’s change that to demand! That is, from facilities, agencies and organizations who purport to stand for aging populations but are nowhere to be found when you need them most.Read More
Which comes first? Respect or respect? Are you as perplexed by this odd question as participants of my leadership development, performance coaching and communication skills programs have been in corporate Canada for over 30 years? If so, good!Read More
Let’s start this week’s post by recapping where we’re at in the COMPLETE SUPPORT “Manifesto” I believe all caregivers of aging parents are entitled to.
We’ve already covered from the COMPLETE acronym the qualities of: Caring; Openness; Maturity; Partnership; Loyalty; Excellence. We’re dealing today with “T” standing for Tribe. Next week we’ll address Exacting – as in, demonstrating impeccable standards of precision.Read More
OK, I admit it. Even I didn’t have the guts to take on sacred Mother’s Day or celebratory Father’s Day when they were upon us a while ago. It seems the hue and outcry too quickly becomes enraged if you don’t worship Mom or respect Dad.
For those who genuinely do, consider yourself lucky. You’re in the minority amongst my circles. My heart personally goes out to those whose parental relationship is at best checkered.
Please understand,Read More
When we were last in this space, I began to set forth the likes of a Manifesto to bolster beleaguered Sandwich Generation caregivers everywhere. My purpose remains to call out those who claim to serve aging populations (in healthcare, legal, insurance, financial, automobile, real estate and funeral realms) butRead More
You know what? On the heels of composing my series about a typical caregiver’s day, I realized something.
While a lot of my writing orients toward championing the beleaguered Sandwich Generation, there exist some further distinctions. Coaching and workshop clients have mentioned these. I’d therefore like to extend huge kudos to three types of peopleRead More
What is an “un-cope-able” parent?
Let me put it like this. If you’ve ever:
- Verbally fought just short of coming to blows over gently proposing a new life-chapter to your elderly parents;
- Met unquantifiable resistance in merely hinting your headstrong duo leave their soothingly-familiar residence (or at least consider in-home care because they no longer manage basic daily tasks);
- Applied your full catering power and still your exhausted capacity comes nowhere close to satisfying their needy bottomless pit.
Congratulations! You have impossible parents!
Oh, to have cooperative aging folks. Alas, you drew the proverbial straw’s short end and pulled resistant seniors.
Picking up where we left off… “It ain’t over till it’s over”, as Yogi Berra legendarily used to say…
Here is a 48-hour tale about the medical crisis of a friend’s mother-in-law who resides in the Independent Living section of an assisted-living facility. When you’re finished reading this harrowing tale, tell me if you still believe you’re “done” once your aging parent is housed in a residence of some sort!Read More
Today is the third anniversary of my father’s Memorial Service. Wow.
Three years later, I can immediately summon who was present – and who was not. Both groupings of people seem equally important to me. Yes, there is no finer moment in life to discern who is TRULY “there” for you than navigating the transitions associated with an elder’s passing – especially that of an Un-cope-able Parent.
As I see it, there are three points of distinction and/or decision-making you will be called upon to make.Read More
Having seen my Dad through escalating crises, hospitalization and his passing three summers ago, surely you’d expect me to have long ago entered Bridges’ New Beginnings phase of the Transitions Model. Sorry to say, but the answer remained a definitive NO until 2015.
Our key point here is that just because you’ve gone through Endings and the Neutral Zone does not automatically mean you’re now in New Beginnings. Everyone has their own pace.Read More