Coping with Un-Cope-Able Parents, Loving Action for Eldercare Coping with Un-Cope-Able Parents, Loving Action for Eldercare
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A Terribly Broken System

healthcare hospital

Are you ready for the next installment in what I call The Hospital Ordeal that plagued my cousin and me?  Here’s what happened next.

Aren’t You Done Yet?

Sometime during hour 2 in the chilly Emergency holding-pen (like the public were cattle), an impatient nurse dumped a pee bottle on the bed.  She demanded my out-of-it cousin produce a urine sample on command.  Many folks can’t.  Graphically, it is NOT helpful to hover angrily over the “organ”.  Pushed to the limit, I finally retorted: “Ya, blame the family member.  It’s always their fault.”  The Non-Compassionate One backed off.  Smart move.

YOU Are His Caregiver!

Next, her belligerent colleague imposed a huge “should” by expecting me to accompany him to the washroom throughout his stay.  Last time I looked, I lack the training to singularly support a 220-pound male frame.  The kicker was when she assumed I would change my cousin’s “diapers” if necessary.  Oh, have you been his relative for 58 years?  The man would NEVER want such humiliation.  You just made a gross error, lady, in more ways than one.

Call Your MPP

Assaulted verbally throughout the 8-hour ordeal on Day 1, I deliberately avoided the hospital on Day 2.  My cousin was fine and just needed to get certain pills out of his system.  If I’d shown my face, I would’ve been forced to do THEIR every job for them.  Early evening, they called to obtain his health plan card.  I couldn’t locate it and she was practically irate.  She ultimately hung up on me.  Really?

Caregivers Unite!

I expressed outrage that my cousin was now in holding pen #3 and not a private bed as promised.  The last straw was when this individual DARED to suggest that if I don’t like it, then I should call my Member of Parliament.  Are you kidding me??  At this point, she was shouting and over-talking me.  Not good.

Now, before any medical professionals reading this post jump all over my back, I commend to the hilt the terrific paramedics who attended my cousin at home.  They were gifted angels.  I even thank the 24/7 nurse who provided initial advice by phone.

We encountered a few lovely people along the way.   Those types of examples are documented in my book, Coping with Un-cope-able Systems: ADVOCACY for Eldercare available at  www.copingwithuncopeableparents.com.

However, Canadians REALLY need to find a voice to defend OUR rights in the face of impossible institutions and bureaucracies.  Next time, my call to action will be to stand up and rise up!

Photo credit: Foter.com

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Carol-Ann Hamilton

Carol-Ann Hamilton

Carol-Ann Hamilton has taken her 25 years of corporate experience and turned it into an issue of personal importance. She is a pioneer-activist on the leading-edge of the exploding aging crisis and seeks to save fellow Sandwich Generation caregivers a fraction of her anguish.
Carol-Ann Hamilton

Latest posts by Carol-Ann Hamilton (see all)

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