As with the LOVING attitudes, if you reflect back to me how “soft” most of those behaviors seem, you win the prize! Again, that is a very deliberate choice on my part.
There’s an equivalent within the corporate world right now. Slowly, the scales of justice are beginning to favor those leaders and organizations high on Emotional Intelligence instruments in their quest to attract, retain and engage the next-generation workforce. It’s not just the “hard” skills that make the grade anymore.
In a similar vein concerning Un-cope-able Parents, I offer a reminder of what my friend, Suzette, drummed into me years ago: “You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.” Wow, did I inwardly rebel when she trotted out that catch-phrase! But she’s right.
Let’s remind ourselves of higher intentions.
When all is said and done, we’ve already established your Real Self genuinely longs to support your aging folks with kindness so they and you can go to your graves certain you did everything in your capability for them.
Since that is your heartfelt Intention, I respectfully ask: Are you through with banging your head against the wall? Surely, Dr. Phil would inquire: How’s that working for you?
Not so much, right? Excellent!! That’s why I urge you to give the ACTION verbs a try.
A last round of summoning…
You further know, don’t you that serving your parents’ greatest interests will entail setting aside your agendas – hidden and otherwise – regarding what you’d prefer to do.
In turn, I fully appreciate how objectionable that statement strikes you. Believe me!
For, if you have fully Un-cope-able Parents, you feel like you’ve been doing just that your entire life!! Not some more, you protest!
Unfortunately, you are being called forth to rise up to be and do – a last time – what is called for to ease their transitions so all of you can rest in peace and tranquility upon their eventual passing.
The saga continues.
Indeed, as I sit down to write today, I am vividly aware of the two-year anniversary approach of my father’s loss on August 26, 2012.
Next time, please allow me to share what happened just when we thought his situation was stabilized.
I think Yogi Berra’s famous line expresses my sentiments perfectly: “It ain’t over till it’s over.”