On the heels of Coping with Un-cope-able Siblings, are you ready to add a whole additional host of often-outrageous relatives around your holiday table? Get ready! Watch for the annual fireworks to heat up big time.
What Are You Bringing to the Table?
And we don’t mean the turkey, either! We’re talking about mindsets such as Grace and Neutrality. What?? You mean, I’m supposed to be adult while everyone else is acting like an idiot? Never feel forced into ways-of-being that are inauthentic for you. It’s just that you seek to be a Conscious Caregiver, right? If so, this means rising above the drama like you were on a helicopter ride. You only control your part of any interaction. Unfortunate but true.
Have You Planned Ahead?
And we don’t mean the presents, either! If calm attitudes seem too lofty or idealistic, let’s turn to some practical matters. Whether you’re traveling or hosting, BOUNDARIES are your number one take-away. Boundaries around your time daily and overall. Before you head out or relatives arrive, deliberately intend how you want things to roll out during the festivities and after. What we focus on expands. Expect chaos and that is what you will receive. Make sense?
A Few Favorite Strategies
Start by identifying your three most crazy-making hot buttons (i.e., what people will say or do that infuriates). Imagine yourself surrounded by an invisible energy bubble 360-degrees around, above and below your physical body. Picture it coated with silver, like a mirror. Any verbal barbs or inappropriate questions will get deflected and be unable to penetrate your interior. I have used this technique with even the most toxic bosses. Please try it.
Of course, anything I advise you at this point almost arrives too late. The time to have caught you was while making the same old plans by default because “that’s the way we’ve always done it in our family.” Thus, I pray you will read these wise words and seriously consider how you will have next year’s holiday season be DIFFERENT.
Bottom-line, this hectic set of weeks will become what you make of it. As well, I urge you to find even one thing to be grateful for this year. How about we start with food on the table in a world with so many hungry and homeless?
Meanwhile, you might want to listen to my radio show archive on this subject at